'I Feel Like a Butterfly Coming Out of a Cocoon'Seated on a piano bench in her bright, contemporary home in Englewood Cliffs, N.J., Gloria Gaynor was talking over plans for her next concert. For years, she said, she stood alone onstage, singing over prerecorded audio tracks. No more. At the upcoming show, Ms. Gaynor, 81, would be performing with a 10-piece ensemble that included a horn section and a trio of background singers — a level of professionalism she insists on in her contract. "Gloria Gaynor is a luxury item," she said. "Either you can afford her or you can't." It has taken Ms. Gaynor a lifetime to deliver such a diva line. The singer who became the embodiment of standing up for yourself — thanks to her signature anthem, "I Will Survive" — said she struggled for years with low self-esteem. As a result, she ended up adrift. Since making the decision to take charge of her life and career, she has finally become a match for the self-assured vocalist heard on so many recordings, including her latest single, "Fida Known," a song that harks back to disco's golden years while sounding very much of the moment. "I feel like a butterfly coming out of a cocoon," Ms. Gaynor said. Born Gloria Fowles, she was raised in a large family in Newark. She didn't know her father, a nightclub singer. Her mother, whom everybody called Queenie May, was a big-hearted, blunt-speaking woman with a beautiful voice. At age twelve, Ms. Gaynor was molested by one of her mother's boyfriends, she has said in interviews. She kept the abuse a secret for decades, including from the readers of her 1995 memoir, "Soul Survivor." When Ms. Gaynor was a teenager, her mother recognized that she had real talent when she heard her singing the jazz standard "Lullaby of the Leaves." Queenie May gave her daughter plenty of encouragement back when she was working a string of day jobs while singing in clubs at night, but she didn't live to see her grand success. She died of lung cancer in 1970, when Ms. Gaynor was 27 and still struggling to make a name for herself. She had her breakout success in 1975 with "Never Can Say Goodbye," her remake of a 1971 hit for the Jackson 5. Thanks to its nonstop beat, lush strings and Ms. Gaynor's impassioned vocals, it became a worldwide smash and the first song to appear at No. 1 in Billboard magazine's newly created Disco/Dance chart. Ms. Gaynor set a standard for the genre, according to the critic and music historian Vince Aletti, one of the first writers to take disco seriously. "Women ruled the dance floor for years, and Gloria was the first to have a powerful sound," Mr. Aletti said. "You could tell she was going to last." She was billed as the Disco Queen — and it wasn't just some concert promoter's hype. In 1975, at a ceremony in Manhattan held by the International Association of Discothèque Disc Jockeys, Ms. Gaynor looked radiant in a floor-length gown as a crown was placed atop her head and the organizers bestowed upon her the title "Queen of the Discothèques." But it's hard to stay on top — and her prospects seemed bleak a few years later, when she fell backward over a stage monitor while performing at the Beacon Theater in New York. She underwent surgery and a grueling recovery. Then came "I Will Survive." It was composed by Dino Fekaris and Freddie Perren, a pair of songwriters who had formerly worked for Motown, and it suited Ms. Gaynor perfectly. With utter conviction, she sang of being wronged by a lover, breaking free and holding her head high as she moved into an independent life. She knew the song was good, but the record label relegated it to the B side of her 1978 single "Substitute." True to its name, however, "I Will Survive" refused to be held down. Disc jockeys flipped the disc, and it went to No. 1 on the Billboard Hot 100 and won a Grammy. "There was an upbeat excitement when that record came on," Mr. Aletti said. "It had a real emotional kick. Men and women — especially gay men — had this sense that we will pull through. She was singing for everybody on the dance floor."
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